An unexpected complaint
by goombablood
Summary: It was supposed to be a normal day, really it was. How was I supposed to expect a few surprise visiters on my laptop? And the bad news is that they look ticked.


**Disclaimer: I own none of Detective Conan, Gosho Aoyama does**

**Me: YAY! Time to have some fun and tortu- er I mean entertain my favorite characters.**

My POV

I sighed for the nth time as I walked home through the cold snow. It was the middle of November and the weather god thought it would be funny to give us lots and lots of snow. I watched as snow fell from the dead grey sky like little shooting stars. I finally made it to my goal, a white two-storied house, my house.

Not wanting to freeze my butt off any longer I opened the door and headed into the living room. It was there I yanked off my coat and backpack and put them away for the day. 'Well at least I get two days off because of Thanksgiving' I thought to myself.

Afterwards I ventured upstairs to take a well-deserved hot shower. I got out around ten or so minutes later and put on a pair of soft sleep wear and bathrobe along with black slippers. As usual I got onto my laptop to see if there was anything new.

'Let's see, any new Takagi fanfics? No. Any new Detective Conan episodes subbed? No. Any good pictures on deviantart? *sigh* No.' I was just about to close my laptop when I remembered to check my emails. Part of me didn't want to, knowing the fact that all I usually got was junk-mail. But I had nothing else to do for the time being so I checked anyways.

After several minutes of fighting our crappy internet access (damn you comcast) I logged in to . The first thing that I noticed was that there were 20 new emails. I scowled, they were all advertisements for items that I didn't need and didn't care about in the slightest.

I began the tedious process of deleting the junk, unknowing what was going to happen. I was about half way done when I noticed an email from a place that I never expected to even hear from.

_Tokyo, Japan_

I blinked and blinked again. Now curious, I clicked on the email and to my surprise nothing was written there. Not even any cool Japanese or anything. That's when I noticed that there were two items attached to it. I clicked on the items to see what they were. And due to my slow as hell internet it took as much time as I needed to go downstairs and grab some chips. When I got back it showed the names of the items on the screen. I looked at the screen and on cue my eyes widened and my jaw dropped. I couldn't believe what I was reading.

Item 1: Ninzaburo Shiratori

Item 2: Wataru Takagi

After a couple of seconds thinking nothing but WTF in every way I know, I clicked on the files and then clicked open. Suddenly two very familiar cops appeared on my desktop. Takagi was leaning against the border of my desktop while Shiratori was standing normally facing towards me. I gulped when I noticed something they had in common.

They both looked pissed.

Suddenly Shiratori pointed a finger at me. "YOU!" he said in an angry tone. I sweat dropped, what could they want from me? "Um yeah, this is me" I replied dumbly. "Do you know why we are here?" he asked. "No actually" I said. Shiratori narrowed his eyes, "We are here to talk about that abomination you posted on the internet."

'Abomination that I put onto the web? I've uploaded all sorts of crap onto the internet which one are they talking abou-….oh…..THAT abomination.' I smiled as the memories of not-so-long-ago came back. 'That's right; I wrote a fanfic about them getting it on like rabbits awhile back. It looks like they caught wind of it and disagree with some of its ideas.'

"Wipe that smile off your face! You are in a lot of trouble" hissed Shiratori. I still kept smiling though. "I know what you guys are talking about and truthfully I don't see anything wrong with it" I told them. On cue their jaws dropped to the floor of the desktop in astonishment. Then Takagi spoke up, "Goombablood-kun don't you think it is a bit false?" I raised an eyebrow. "What's so false about it?" I asked back.

"EVERYTHING!" yelled Shiratori; man did that guy wake up on the wrong side of the bed or what? I was about to ask again when Shiratori continued on his rant. "For one thing I am not gay, and even if I was gay I would never have sex with him of all people" he growled. "Dude, that's why it's called fanfiction, of course it would never happen" I responded back hoping it would calm him down.

Shiratori glared at me, "Fanfiction or not your still taking it down." "But why?" I asked. I liked that one a lot; I worked very hard on it. "Why don't you tell her Takagi-kun you are her favorite after all." Takagi looked down at his shoes as if he was ashamed of himself. "It's because the rest of the division read this." I paled 'oh shit'. Takagi continued, "They think it is true and have been calling us fags. Even Sato-san…" Takagi stopped talking and just looked down.

I stared in disbelief. I felt so bad; I didn't mean to cause Sato and Takagi to break up. I didn't even want to think about what Sato told him. I had to make it up to him somehow. Then an idea formed; an idea so simple and yet so clever it couldn't possibly backfire.

"Tell ya what Takagi, how about I email your colleagues and tell them that it's just a story that I made up." Takagi looked at me with those cute eyes of his, "what about Sato-san?" I grinned, "Don't worry I'll make sure she listens." Takagi's face lit up with joy upon hearing this. "Thank you so much for this" said Takagi. "No problem" I replied.

Suddenly, a Takagi-fangirl thought came into mind. "Hold on a sec Taru-chan" I told him. Takagi blushed at the pet name but listened. I quickly opened my documents file and guided my mouse over the file named "fanfictions". I sometimes copy stories written on and store them into my computer so incase of the story being taken down or the internet not working I could still read them.

I clicked on the file and began my search. I found what I was looking for and clicked "copy". I then dragged the copy over to Takagi and the document landed in his hands. He blinked, "What is it?" I let loose a grin that the Cheshire cat would be proud of, "it's a fanfiction that was written by someone else. I want you to go home and read it all the way through, it might give you some ideas." Takagi raised an eyebrow and looked at the title of the story.

_Molten Love, by RedAndGold Phoenix_

Takagi shrugged and disappeared from the desktop along with the well-written fanfic. 'Well, I'm at least glad that's settled' I looked at Shiratori, 'now onto other matters'. Shiratori narrowed his eyes, "If you think I'm going to leave as easy as Takagi-kun did then you are horribly mistaken." I was confused, "But I just solved the issue what else is wrong?" "I still want you to take it down before anymore people see" said Shiratori.

I sighed; I was not going to let this guy tell me what I can and can't put up onto the internet. "Look, I'm sorry but I'm not taking it down. A lot of people like it and are actually taking their time to read it, isn't there anything else I can do?" He shook his head, "I'm not leaving until you promise to get rid of it." I groaned, how was I going to get rid of him? Then the mallet of great ideas whacked me upon the head, giving me the greatest plan yet.

I opened up my email and began to type for help to a certain someone. "Who are you typing to?" Shiratori asked. Before he could see it I quickly sent it on its way. "Oh it was just a friend." He narrowed his eyes in suspicion but shrugged, giving up rather quickly. "Anyway, I can understand why you hate it but why so much as to actually want it gone?" I asked innocently. "It's because I don't want anyone else seeing me like that" he snarled.

Suddenly a new email showed up in my inbox. I looked at it and smiled in relief, it was called "solution". I clicked on it and read its contents. When I finished reading my face was beat-red but then transformed into an evil grin. Oh yes, this was going to be fun.

"Hey Ninza-chan, come over here for a sec" I said. Shiratori glared daggers at me but walked over to my mouse anyway. "What is it now?" he asked. I grinned some more, "Can you take a look at this with me? I can't understand it." Shiratori rolled his eyes at me. "Fine, but you will get rid of that story afterwards". I nodded, 'heh, let's see if your still here to make me after THIS!'

I opened the video attached to the email and started it. Shiratori looked directly at the screen before him, his attention fixated on it. When he did this I immediately turned around and squeezed my eyes shut. This was not something I wanted forever burned into my skull. In a few seconds I heard the way too innocent sounding music beginning to play.

Shiratori blinked, and blinked again. "Goombablood, WHAT exactly am I watching?" I didn't answer; I myself truly didn't want to know. Shiratori's eyes bulged to the size of saucer plates as he stared at the "show". "WHAT THE HELL? IS THIS PORN?" he exclaimed out of surprise. I continued to keep my eyes closed, my mind starting to worry. 'Man, what if he can take it? I mean, he's a police officer after all, he's probably seen much worse than this' I thought to my self. Now to long after this the "strong stuff" came. Shiratori paled and his eye twitched.

That night everyone wondered what fair maiden uttered such a high-pitched scream of sheer terror.

I turned around and smiled at my police-free desktop. 'Man, Shiratori screams like a girl, kinda like Sonoko actually' I thought smugly to myself. I opened up the email again and typed a reply giving my thanks. 'HA! And people said it was a bad idea to have the Kaito kid's email-address. But I wonder where on earth did he get the video Two Girls One Cup? Or better yet, why does he have it in the first place?' I thought to myself. Once I finished with my reply I went to work on the email for Takagi. Well, I'm at least glad everything will turn out okay.

THE NEXT DAY

Takagi was walking down the hall of the police station with a big smile on his face. The email was read and everybody apologized profusely, give or take a few mutters of "I still think they're gay". He stopped when he heard the sound of someone running in high-heels. He knew that sound anywhere. Takagi turned around to meet his superior and crush Sato.

She looked at him, "Takagi-kun". Said man blushed at his name being said. "Um, yeah Sato-san?" Takagi was still a bit hurt about what she said to him the other day. Sato averted her eyes in embarrassment, "I wanted to say I'm sorry about yesterday. I should have known you wouldn't do something like that".

Takagi looked at the love of his life. "It's okay, I'm just glad it's all settled". Sato smiled and nodded. They both walked towards the break room, holding hands, not caring who saw. Then a thought suddenly hit Takagi. "Hey Sato-san", Sato looked at him, "What is it Takagi-kun?" She asked. His eye's furrowed, "where's Shiratori-san? I haven't seen him all day." Sato sighed, "We think he's gone off the deep end".

Takagi stopped and gaped at her. "What? Why?" he asked her. "It's because when Meguire-keibu called him asking why he isn't at work he didn't answer. So we went over there to see what was wrong. We found him curled up in a corner muttering to himself 'the cup' over and over again." Takagi stared at her, dumbfounded. He soon got his ability to speak again. "Well, where is he now? Said Takagi. "We dropped him off at therapy to figure out why he's acting like that."

That's when Sato noticed something. "Takagi-kun, what are you holding?" she asked. "It's just another case that Meguire-keibu gave me earlier" he replied. Sato narrowed her eyes, "Strange, I've never seen a case named something like 'Molten Love' before". "Neither have I" said Takagi. Sato shrugged, "Anyway, white day is coming up, what's your plans for it?" Takagi grinned, "It's a secret". Sato smiled and walked away.

Takagi looked down at the fanfic that he was given. Oh yes, white day was going to be unforgettable. And somewhere else in the world of Detective Conan a certain thief clad in white was sending the same video to three certain detectives while laughing manically.

**Yay! I've outdone myself yet again. I hope you all enjoyed this as much as I did.**

**Takagi: Thanks for fixing all of this.**

**Me: No problem Taru-chan**

**Shiratori: *in a straitjacket* …..the cup…**

**Takagi: *sweat drops* is Shiratori-san going to be alright?**

**Me: Yeah he'll be fine**

**Shiratori: AHHHHHHHHH! THE CUP IS GOING TO KILL ME!**

**Takagi: 0_0**

**Me: Okay, nevermind**


End file.
